“A Kapitany”, Chapter 23 with a WARNING.

Don’t read this chapter if you have a problem with Violence, Male to Male Violence, BDSM, Sex,….

Vadas entered the suite and looked for Elizabeth. She was not in bed. In fact, the bed was still made. No one had slept there. He pressed the numbers of the hotel safe in the closet. Her passport was still there. She hadn’t left. So where was she?

He called Zoltan on his cell, but there was no answer. He passed his hand through his hair, and pulled at his lips. He went down to the reception, but no one had seen her enter.

Vadas punched some numbers. He needed to gather men and go look for Zoltan and Elizabeth. Zoltan always answered his cell so this was strange. Actually, it was alarming, considering the conversation with Miklos. He didn’t put it past Miklos to pull something. He was a bit too curious about Elizabeth during their meeting. This nagged Vadas as he came back to Budapest at dawn.

Four of Vadas’ men came in two cars: Andor, Sami, Peti, Markus, all from Eger. They were the men Vadas trusted the most. These men had been tromping through the woods up by Miklos’ the day before. Now they were going back to his house. They didn’t know what they would find, and didn’t know what else to do. Near Esztergom, on a heavily forested road, they found the Mercedes. It had been pushed far off the road and into a gully. Only the sharp eyes of one of them saw the car.

“Vadas, there’s the car.”

“Oh, God,” mummured Vadas. “Let’s get it open.”

They slipped down the bank and surrounded the car. Andor looked in the back seat.

“No one is here. They must have had an accident and walked until they were picked up. But why haven’t they called, Vadas?”

“This is no accident Andor. Pop the trunk.”

Zoltan was lying in blood. He was shot somewhere in the torso and barely alive.

“Oh Jesus,” muttered Vadas. Others crossed themselves. Zoltan was well known to all of them.

“Sami, you and Peti take him to hospital in Esztergom. Tell them you found him on the road, but don’t be specific where. Check his pockets and remove any identification. You know what to do.”

Vadas sat down on the bank. He was shocked to see Zoltan. He also was relieved they hadn’t found Elizabeth in the same condition. The others stood around, nervously smoking.

“Ok, we know this was no accident. Zoltan wasn’t the target, Elizabeth was. So, who would want to take her? Only one I can think of is Miklos. This was done under his orders.” Vadas cursed quietly. “ I shouldn’t have let her out of my sight.”

“Vadas.” Markus broke the silence. “I know one of Miklos’ men. He lives in Esztergom somewhere, but I bet he’s in a bar. This was serious business last night. He probably needs a drink right now.”

They tried to push the car further in the gully, but the front wheels had sunk into the soft soil. They piled into the remaining car and drove fast back to Esztergom. There were numerous bars in this old city and they entered three before they found Miklos’ man.

He was hunched over a drink at the end of the counter. It was early in the morning, not a time for drinking. He was almost alone except for the bartender and a old man asleep in the corner. He didn’t look up until they approached him. Then he tried to bolt and Markus tripped him.

“Out. And be quiet about it, Barna.”

Barna’s eyes were wild with fear. He didn’t recognize Vadas, but he did Markus.

They hustled him out into the piss smelling alley behind the bar.

“Ok, Barna, tell us where the woman is. Be quick about it.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about. I don’t know any woman.”

“Ok, you want to play hard ball? Fine with us. Hold him”, said Vadas.

Vadas loosened Barna’s belt and pulled down his pants, exposing Barna’s genitals. Barna’s eyes got wide at the sight of Vadas’ knife. Grabbing his cock, Vadas started to cut Barna at the top of it by his belly. Barna started to scream, while Andor put his hand over his mouth, silencing him. His eyes were pleading with Vadas not to do this.

Vadas spoke quietly. “Here’s how it goes, Barna. Where did you take the woman? You got one last chance to answer before I cut your cock off and stuff it down your throat. Now, look me in the eyes and tell the truth. That’s if you ever want to fuck a woman again.”

Andor removed his hand and Barna started to blabber. “I didn’t do it, I didn’t take the woman.”

“Ok, Barna, say goodbye to your dick”. Vadas started to slice at the root of his cock, blood spurting over his hand. Barna was yelling for him to stop. He would tell him what he knew.

“Miklos Farhas ordered her taken. I didn’t shoot your man, someone else did. But they drove the woman back to Farhas’ house, but not to the house.”

“You are not making sense, man. And you are pissing me off.” Vadas grabbed the terrified man by the shirt front, pulling him up close.

“Better I end your worthless life right now with a stick between the ribs. Your choice, Barna.”

“Listen to me. There is a road above the big house. It was up there she was taken. It’s a small stone house, maybe once a summer house, I don’t know. But she was knocked out by a rag over her face. They took her up there.”

“Do any of you know what this bastard is talking about? Have you seen this house?”

“We can find it, Vadas. We can get her back.”

Vadas turned his attention to Barna. “You get to keep your limp cock, but you will lose something. Just so you never to go up against me again.”

Vadas grabbed Barna’s right hand and chopped off a finger. Andor held his arms and Markus slapped his hand over Barna’s eyes. Vadas shoved the finger into Barna’s mouth. Barna spit it out, weeping.

Vadas grabbed Barna’s jaw and stuck his knife in Barna’s nose. “If I ever see you again, Barna, you will be losing more than your cock.”

They left the weeping, terrified man collapsed on the ground. It was a bad day for Barna. He didn’t smell so good, either.

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11 Responses to ““A Kapitany”, Chapter 23 with a WARNING.”

  1. Steve Elsaesser Says:

    Cannot say I “enjoyed” this, Jane. However I can think of worse: BEING Barna. Holy Crap!Of course, that he didn’t smell none too good capped off your story real good.
    Thanks…I think–grin!

    (You DID warn us!) Much worse happens at my house–on the TV…..



  2. ladynyo Says:

    LOL! Steve~! Holy Crap indeed~ LOL! and glad much worse happens at your house….on the TV~ LOL!

    This was an exercise in a woman writing violence. This woman, who runs from this stuff…doesn’t embrace it. But it was a push. I passed it over to Bill Penrose, who has formatted and basically published my books on Lulu.com for me. Bill’s a big, manly man….and a bit older than I….and knows all about the world of male violence…though he is one of the gentlest men I know. I adore him, and seek his advice on so much of writing…and other things. He’s an excellent writer I met on ERWA back in 2007. He mentored me in writing in the most gentle and encouraging way possible. I owe him more than I can write.

    So, his evaluation was that I ‘handled the scene well’….and it wasn’t ‘too’ violent for the book. Holy Crap, again! Wasn’t too violent?? LOL! I pulled out all the stops writing that scene, and I have to say it was a lot of fun…but I wouldn’t want to ‘go there’ every day. LOL!

    Thank you, Steve, for reading Chapter 23 of “A Kapitany”. It’s a book I put down years ago because the whole theme (bdsm) just scared me silly and I really had no experience at all in it. And when I attempted to ‘learn the ropes’ of it??? I ran. Fast. Some pretty weird people in that scene.

    When I went back to it this fall, the theme had shifted into international art thievery, which i was more comfortable writing. Criminal minds are interesting.

    But! I hope to finish this novel by this spring, and I think I will. I’ve been rewriting as I look at the previous chapters, so we will see.

    By the way, I met the man who is the character of Miklos. Every reason to run.

    Thanks for reading and your comment, Steve.



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    Thank you for writing.

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